Neophyte-Ronin's audio Reviews on Newgrounds

[In a World of Shit demo]

Okay, the Chainsaw and Screaming Just Started

I would have just given you a 9 without that.

Of course, that also nixes my ability to clip it in Audacity for use in an actual video game in Flash. I intend to conjure something up as I've yet to make through with my promise to Bad-Man concerning the BBQBeefBurgerMan Game I had in mind. Throwing out your back and not being able to sit in front of your computer for long periods of time without excruciating pain can do that to your lead time.

In any case, this World of Shit demonstration you have is pretty slick and evil, like Black Mage when he was King of Hell for twenty minutes. To achieve that level of rocking has got to give you incentive to tough out your stay at Newgrounds because a 3.50+ batting average is still something to be proud of. They can't all be 4.33+ you know.

This has Five/RESPECT written all over its cancerous shell. Continue fucking everyone's moms like it's goin' outta style!

Demon-Slayer12 responds:

Thats inspiring dude, but the thing is that I know I've accomplished a lot, but it seems now that my popularity has nose-dived because of my absence and everything I submit gets shit on. It really bums me out to not see all the reviews I used to get, and all the downloads and shit, even though I didn't make my best attempts to respond to them all, I still loved reading them, but i guess maybe people were getting sick of telling me how awesome I am hahaha! Btw, all my tunes should be 4.33+ in my opinion (yeah, in my own little fucked up world) except for a few of my very old tunes (which I think were really awesome at the time) Thanks for the kickass review man, glad to see some people still care :D its people like you that make me come back man, cheers!

[pt 1. of new song-Metaljonus]

Excellence

Well, I have listened to this through and through and I keep wondering when you are going to finish it. I swear the lengthy acoustic intro is just the proper intro to an excellent cinematic action sequence, but without the other two parts, this piece can only go so far. I already have a general understanding about where to take it... but seriously... all I can say is: finish it.

Take it as a compliment when someone says that; they insist on hearing a little more!

Metaljonus responds:

Thanks for the kind words man! but my comp crashed and lost alot so I can't finish it. it fucking sucks but I want to rewrite somethings in the next 2 parts but it will take some time. thanks again!

-Mj

[-Orr- Vitality]

Clean, Energetic, Cool

I've noticed that your MBs for this song is 3.3, the song lasts for 3:33, and the number of reviews (before this one) is a number divisible by 3.

Of course, the song kicks ass too.

[Necro (explicit language)]

I'm Amused and Perturbed

Hey, you know that Sexy Losers comic has a necrophiliac named Shiunji Watanabe whose dead cadaver lover comes back from the dead with the sole desire to murder his sorry ass?

...You and I ought to go out on the town once I move out to Australia. I bet you'd find me cute enough to murder, too!

Okay, stupid jokes aside, this is totally bad. Someone will make it into a music video in NG (probably Stamper). That's testament to your ability, though not quite your psyche. I doubt you'd actually go through with this stuff, as it is just an evil satire.

...RESPECT!

[Rip-off medley]

Whoa, what the hell?

Well, yeah, you made my day. This song is absolutely out there. I'm still listening to it loop at max volume inside an apartment complex full of old women. I'm astonished, that's why. All I ask is for you to actually write the lyrics in a reply or something because someone will get the crazy idea to actually make a flash out of it. It's definitely music video material, a satirical one at that.

Xenogenocide responds:

No problem man,

The lyrics:

(random brutal death metal shit)

ROOOOOOOOOAAARARARAARARRRRR!!!!!!!
Weed in a bong is the only way to
Get high and masturbate to this shit song
Feel my cock pour cum so slowly in you
It's filthy, cheese-riddled and spongey and long!

(random funk bit)

Yeah! I don't know the words to this song
I'll just make it up as I go along

(SLAYERRRRRR!!!!)

ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
The devil's gay!
I can tell!
The way that he looks in my eye!
Dildos!
shoved up my arse!
enough to make you burt out CRYYYIIIIINNNNG!!!!

(Red hot chili peppers)

Charlie's making me
Charlie's making me
Charlie's making me horny, woah! - By the way he's a guy.

(Slayer again)

ARRRRRRGGGHHHHH!!!
Suck my big fat metal dick!

(Metallica bit)

James fuckin hetfield, I'm james fuckin hetfield, I'm james yeah yeah, yeah!

(crappy funk bit)\

I hope you enjoyed this crappy rip off of all these songs... and I don't even know why I'm talking in an american accent!

(Nirvana bit)

Ahhh that's good smack!

I'm a druggie!
I take smaaaack!
inject it in!
My butt crack! yeah!

[Dark Age]

Hate is Nothing New

This song rocks. I know it will become a staple of all really evil bad guys' themes when an audio portal-savvy flash animator sets out to create a flash. God yes, I think I'm going to use this sucker for something... evil...!

You only got a 4 in Originality because expressing hatred over jerks isn't necessarily new. The song itself is very effective in what it does, though all the effects might be a little trite. Still, the cool samples, clearness of the sound, and the efforts all give you a well-deserved ten.

P.S. I vote zero only on absolute garbage. I've never known you to make garbage of any kind (I incidentally voted five because it can fit in a falsh just so easily, especially the crescendo and ominous end!).

Bosa responds:

A truly great mind is right here, folks. Neophyte tells it as it should be told.

That's right. We need more people like you on Newgrounds.

[EMO PARODY]

Captures it Perfectly

Okay, I rarely ever listen to alt-rock stations because they inundated the airwaves with this kind of disgusting crap, only that stuff is serious and this isn't.

Were you drunk when you did this with your buds?

After like eight plays while eating oatmeat at 4:33 AM in the fuckin' morning, I sat down just to keep myself from laughing and choking.

Whenever you get the chance to murder someone's style of music, please do so in an orderly fashion.

This is the shit.

P.S., once I get a script and some drawings done, I'm contacting you about voice-overs as promised.

[FUCK BATMAN!]

Don't Get It

I don't know what the joke is--other than the title--but I suppose you're trying to wreck the soundtrack to the latest Batman movie. Tell me otherwise or simply explain this... I didn't quite get the joke in the song itself. I did like voicing the song's title repeatedly in the presence of little children, though.

The review is a lukewarm one because the clarity is soft, the church-bells are kind of cliched, and it all smells of cheese. Solid effort, though the collection here has better stuff to chew on. Seven Overall...

Beegeezee responds:

True this one reeks of cheese. I kinda regret making it but this song is a great way for me to gauge how far I've come along in music. And proof that the old saying "You don't Always make the Hits" is still true.

[What I Wanted]

Excellent as Always

I've often run past this one in my system (having downloaded it) and always appreciated it, better than Thumping Pain although that one's emphasis on drum effects kind of sour the mood I get from this one. This one, with its title, suggests inner turmoil, and having it loop softly in the background conveys the same emotion into whatever I'm writing in that moment. Therefore, in too many words, it touches me.

Of course, you get a 5 for originality since it is a common emotional piece--no shortage of them--while Clarity gets 6 since it's a bit soft but otherwise fine. Diversity gets 8, as does Effort.

It might sound dull on rare occasion, but I give a 10 because it's one of the few Beegeezee songs that communicate like a ballad would. It reveals a side of you that isn't as apparent with all the comic mischief in the collection.

[Herbal Shrapnel Rough Draft]

Interesting Departure!

Okay, remember the time you complained about your inability to rock out? This one proves otherwise. It rocks. It's also an industrial track, and I'm pretty sure you never submitted that stuff before. Even in its current state, someone will use this well in a Flash, be it a game or in a psychological fight scene. However, it's a little repetitive and in its early stages, I'd expect that. It's worth working on.

Originality: 8. Bingo; something different.

Clarity: 8. Not too high, not too low on the register. This one is the true Fortress of Doom.

Diversity: 6. Repetitive, but what's there is freaky and cool. This path seems interesting, and also does not appear to suffer from cheesy synths as you suggest; previous works have nothing on this.

Effort: 8. And thankfully, those points aren't wasted.

Overall: 10. Continue this path. You're improving a lot more than you think. Should have downloaded this sucker before!