Neophyte-Ronin's audio Reviews on Newgrounds

[A Love Unforgotten]

I 5'd and Downloaded (actually, I always Download, so that's a moot point). What more do you want out of me?

Oh, right. This is pretty solid. I'm still debating about which musician's back catalog I'm going to use for a project, and you keep popping into my head. These days, there's actual stable leitmotifs instead of constantly shifting moods within seconds of each other, like what you did years ago. That constitutes development. Also, this got the flavor of a courtly romance singing all over it.

So yeah, I don't know who the fuck keeps Zero-Voting you, but it's easy to know why: your stuff tends to kick lots of ass, you're a long-runner, and the top ten per day or week doesn't really matter all that much. The real Flash author pours through the long lists of songs and, if he thinks one has potential, looks up the musician's profile and checks out the list of work as a whole before moving onto the next candidate, downloading as he or she goes along. Quite frankly, no-one should worry so long as their pieces kick ass; it's only a matter of time before someone finds it.

You've been around long enough for zero-voting to be an annoyance, not a merciless deluge. If it feels like that, it's only because you're a long-timer whose skills are notorious throughout the Audio Portal. Ergo, DON'T LET THEM BOTHER YOU!

Bosa responds:

Very true, and thanks. It's good to hear from you after so long, and your 'Big Fat Tutorial' is legendary here on Newgrounds.

I'll keep my chin up and I'll keep moving forward. I can't wait to see what kind of flash you come up with next!

And thanks again.

[GIMME DAT BUTT]

Way to break the deal, Casablanca.

I bet there will be a flood of shit animations that use this track. Keep your fingers crossed.

You made my day, either way.

DruoxtheShredder responds:

Oh, i can't wait to see them.

[Technical Math Metal]

HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA HAAROFL

Two months for this? Get out of here.

(Post-Script: ALTACCOUNT!)

CockRider responds:

Maaan, I don't know what you is tawking 'bout daaawg.
This shit is fo' real and I've been offered a record deal and shit but I turned it down because I need to grow, not only as an artist.... But as a person, Neophyte... As a person.

[Star Wars Metal Medley]

Fuck you, you're GoreBastard and you're fucking with people.

One of the really fine musical TROLL! routines I've heard in a while, which also put a tear in my eye. It's that bad. It actually takes a different talent to un-learn what you've learned and make it deliberately sloppy, and only splice in decent parts that immediately revert to the previous SHITFEST this really was.

Only on the Summer Solstice would you ever hear a CockRider track, but it's actually pretty welcome; we need assholes like these to wake us up from all the serious business that transpires throughout the Audio Portal. In terms of prior jokes, this one is actually pretty well-made and guaranteed to get a few uninformed critics to seriously think that this guy has been playing for two months. Honestly Gore, what would this site be without you?

Can I stop holding onto my socks? Actually, I was never holding on. Someone's got to have the eidetic memory around here....

[Gungnam Metal Style]

Wait... I don't fuckin' get this. At all.

And don't try to help out, either. It'll just make shit worse.

Doesn't detract from solid production and, uh....

[Jiido No Shuugeki (cover)]

While not a fan of Big Dipper Fist, I find this to be a perfect adaptation for what is one of the most irresponsibly goriest things to come out of Japan, and not a single thing from there since then matches it. For everything that could be considered a minus (e.g. the drums are basic) there are plenty of plus signs scattered throughout. It's also one of the cleanest tracks I've heard from you in a long time. Hell, it's one of the only fuckin' tracks I've heard from you in a long time; what's keeping ya?

This is the complementary introductory score to any sensible bad-ass such as ourselves. Thank you and Good-Night.

GoreBastard responds:

Cheers dude! Yeah, I didn't want to go overboard on the drums. For the most part, I pretty much just copied what the original did... That, and my drum samples still suck balls!

Thanks man, if you ever get into any trouble, think of this tune and bad-ass your way out of it!!

[Fade Into the Obscure]

Why hasn't anybody reviewed this? What are they, fucking retarded?

This is pretty slick. You should promote yourself before other hard-asses like Gorebastard and Bad-Man-Incorporated. Try Xenogenocide and Metaljonus. This isn't so bad if it's on par with guys like them. It's also melodramatic, bombastic, like a good hint of classical thunder inspired the progression.

Five Material. Download-Worthy too.

ElektrikWizrD responds:

Haha thanks man. I would but those dudes are super intimidating, hahahaha.